Image by jadca via Flickr
Oh, it’s been one of those months.
A lot of major changes in our household which is making the world feel like it’s tilting the wrong way.
Mr. X is having a bit of a career crisis. He’s in an industry that suffered a steep decline since 2008 when the bottom fell out of the economy. He went from a great job, to a not so great job, to a totally crappy job. He took a 65% pay cut over the last year. In fact, a recent paycheck was so bad we didn’t even bother cashing it (yet). We placed it on the refrigerator behind a mickey mouse magnet as sort of a sick reminder that YES sometimes you really can make less than if you were on unemployment. All the while, he is working 60 hours a week for practically nothing and missing out on being home for his only son. His blood pressure is sky-high, and I worry.
I worry.
He’s been searching and searching for a new job with no results, and now we are at a very weird place. For the first time in his working life, he is considering walking away from a job. I know, this sounds crazy…!! but I am more worried about his health and ability to find another job and NOT being at the mercy of a crappy employer that is monopolizing his life for practically minimum wage.
Sigh.
On the flip side, I have a new job that will (eventually) bring in more money this year. I took a giant promotion for two reasons:
1. to invigorate my own lagging career and provide personal gratification
2. to make up for some of the money loss down the line if things get crazy
Which means, Mr. X could eventually become Mr. Mom at some point down the road. Which excites me and pains me at the same time. This isn’t exactly where I thought we would be in our early 40′s.
But when has anything we planned ever happened as we planned?
Ironically, while my mood has wavered between sadness and sheer panic, oddly I do not feel the overwhelming sense of dread. Maybe it’s the life experience accumulated up to this point.
This situation would have certainly broke me ten years ago. But now? It’s expected. Life sometimes takes us down paths we never thought we would go. Some rocky, some steep. Roads with dead ends and some with wide-open straight-aways. And some that run right up against a mountain.
Wait… I might break into a chorus from a recent Miley Cyrus tune about a mountain.
Nah, I won’t torture you.
But I am sure getting used to climbing.
Sorry to hear about Mr X’s job. Would he be happy about being a Mr Mom? Some guys are just so good at it.
Congrats on your new job! I sucked as a SAHM and was so glad to get back to work. Now however, I find the desire the to mix the two. I want to stay home more but I still crave the satisfaction I get from the work environment. Plus, on those ill-tempered toddler tantrum days, it’s a great excuse to get away! LOL.
Ah that climb, you’d think you’d be at the top of the mountain by now! My husband would love to be a stay at home dad, but gender roles and all that aside he makes way more than I could ever hope to. Besides I like being home with our toddler.
I hope things get easier for your family soon!